A New Low

www.anewlow.net
Carnival season is over—but don’t expect the plethora of dirty quotes, coffee n’ cigarette portraits or videos about pussy that normally clog your social media feeds this time of year. You see, once the carnies packed up the Ferris wheel and merry-go-round in Trumansburg, Scotty packed up his Mötley Crüe CDs and Skoal canisters n’ headed for Colorado, where he’ll be living with his brother for the next year…maybe longer.

I saw him during his stint at the Steuben County fair, where he handed me a urine scented potato sack and let me go down the giant slide for free. Also, in the span of a minute and forty seconds, he assured me of the following key points: 1) He hasn’t gotten any pussy on the road yet. 2) He’d “fucked a new woman every night.” 3) His boss doesn’t let him have sex anymore. 4) His boss always lets him have sex in his truck.

Classic Scotty. 

I miss him already. 

If you ever find yourself in need of a Scotty fix, dig through the archives at www.anewlow.net where he dances and sings his way through an original carnie Christmas song; gives thorough tutorials on sex, fighting and smoking cigarettes…and much, much more. 🚬👨

Carnival season is over—but don’t expect the plethora of dirty quotes, coffee n’ cigarette portraits or videos about pussy that normally clog your social media feeds this time of year. You see, once the carnies packed up the Ferris wheel and merry-go-round in Trumansburg, Scotty packed up his Mötley Crüe CDs and Skoal canisters n’ headed for Colorado, where he’ll be living with his brother for the next year…maybe longer.

I saw him during his stint at the Steuben County fair, where he handed me a urine scented potato sack and let me go down the giant slide for free. Also, in the span of a minute and forty seconds, he assured me of the following key points: 1) He hasn’t gotten any pussy on the road yet. 2) He’d “fucked a new woman every night.” 3) His boss doesn’t let him have sex anymore. 4) His boss always lets him have sex in his truck.

Classic Scotty.

I miss him already.

If you ever find yourself in need of a Scotty fix, dig through the archives at www.anewlow.net where he dances and sings his way through an original carnie Christmas song; gives thorough tutorials on sex, fighting and smoking cigarettes…and much, much more. 🚬👨

“A man without a woman is like a dog without a leash.”

“A man without a woman is like a dog without a leash.”

#summertime #hardbodies (at Sullivan Park (Thorne Street Park))

#summertime #hardbodies (at Sullivan Park (Thorne Street Park))

Switch decapitation. #GuillotineSteez

Switch decapitation. #GuillotineSteez

#centralpark #turtle

#centralpark #turtle

Before we weigh anchor and bring a spring upon her cable, I’m going to splice the main brace, get loaded to the gunwalls n’ crack Jenny’s tea cup—if you catch my sea jive. #grogblossom

Before we weigh anchor and bring a spring upon her cable, I’m going to splice the main brace, get loaded to the gunwalls n’ crack Jenny’s tea cup—if you catch my sea jive. #grogblossom

I caught @endlebrookholden coming out of a women’s lavatory in Midtown Manhattan. #portapottypaparazzi #candidmoments

I caught @endlebrookholden coming out of a women’s lavatory in Midtown Manhattan. #portapottypaparazzi #candidmoments

Yesterday I did the #icebucketchallenge in memory of my uncle Bob. I don’t know what would’ve brought him more joy: seeing a shit ton of goofballs freezing their tits off, or knowing that some cheesy viral internet thing has raised over $41.8 Million for the A.L.S. Association (he had a great sense of humor, so it could’ve gone either way). Regardless, if you haven’t participated yet, get out there and film yourself dipping your balls in some ice water…and make sure you donate to www.alsa.org!

Yesterday I did the #icebucketchallenge in memory of my uncle Bob. I don’t know what would’ve brought him more joy: seeing a shit ton of goofballs freezing their tits off, or knowing that some cheesy viral internet thing has raised over $41.8 Million for the A.L.S. Association (he had a great sense of humor, so it could’ve gone either way). Regardless, if you haven’t participated yet, get out there and film yourself dipping your balls in some ice water…and make sure you donate to www.alsa.org!

Propagandhi at Webster Hall in NYC - 8/17/14.  (at Webster Hall)

Propagandhi at Webster Hall in NYC - 8/17/14. (at Webster Hall)